


And Lord, It Took Me Back To Something That I'd Lost, Somewhere, Somehow Along The Way

by blushingblue__DonnaJane54



Series: Peggy, Angie, Steve, Bucky, Oh My! [2]
Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Powers, Angst, Author Will Write Another, Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky-centric, Canon Divergence, F/M, Implied Sexual Reference, Love, M/M, No war, Self-Inflicted Hate, Songfic, Stucky - Freeform, Sunday Morning Coming Down by Johnny Cash, What Else Can The Author Write, yet another songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-10
Updated: 2017-04-10
Packaged: 2018-10-17 06:43:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10588560
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blushingblue__DonnaJane54/pseuds/blushingblue__DonnaJane54
Summary: Bucky knew it was wrong to lust his best pal, but when Steve first kissed him when they were teenagers, Bucky was hooked. Before Steve went and found Peggy, Bucky had this stupid, hopeless idea that they’d live together in that broken flat forever; grow old and frail and be bachelors, not a doll or kid in sight, and that made Bucky happy, but so, so, so sad.“...In the park I saw a daddyWith a laughing little girl that he was swingingAnd I stopped beside a Sunday schoolAnd listened to the songs they were singing…”





	

**Author's Note:**

> All fuck-overs are mine. Once again, I'm preaching to the choir, comments and kudos are like herion to an addict for me. Thanks EVERYONE so much for leaving comments and kudos for the last instalment, it really made my life brighter!!

It was days like this that Bucky hated.

It was a bright, clear, cold Sunday morning. He swung his legs over the edge of the bed, and the dame in the bed sighed, and rolled over, pale breasts small in the noon sun.

Holy God, she was small. She’d looked bigger and curvier last night, but maybe Bucky was wishful thinking. He liked to have things that were bigger than him.

Bucky pulled his slacks on, and hurriedly pulled his shoes on, and buttoned his shirt up as he slipped down the short hallway, searching for his jacket.

_“Well, I woke up Sunday morning…”_

The radio in the next door neighbor's apartment was droning on, and his head ached from the whiskey he drank at the bar with Jeanie.

Jesus Christ, he didn't like to just leave, but he had to get home. He had to hand in his rent, or he’d get kicked out again.

_“...With no way to hold my head that didn't hurt…”_

He grabbed his jacket from the ratty sitting chair, and threw the panties aside, and peeled the garter belt from the left sleeve. Bucky grabbed a beer on his way out, gently closing the sticky door.

_“...And the beer I had for breakfast wasn't bad  
So I had one more for dessert…”_

Bucky practically jumped down the stairs, and he smiled, embarrassed, at the mother and son who pushed through the front door, clad in their Sunday best. He knew what time it was. He just didn't want to face the big, white-faced clock.

_“...Then I fumbled in my closet through my clothes  
And found my cleanest dirty shirt…”_

Bucky jogged through the neighbourhood, and when his surroundings became more familiar, he sprinted, ignoring his clenching stomach and pounding head.

_“...Then I washed my face and combed my hair  
And stumbled down the stairs to meet the day…”_

Bucky tried to ignore all the churchy people, but it was hard. He wasn't good at this sort of thing, ignoring things. People. Their happy smiles, their hard eyes when they saw his sex hair and dirty clothes.

_“...I'd smoked my mind the night before_  
With cigarettes and songs I'd been picking  
But I lit my first and watched a small kid  
Playing with a can that he was kicking…”

When he passed Steve’s apartment building, he stopped a minute. Maybe, just maybe, if he hurried, he’d catch Steve’s signature bacon, sausages and eggs. He couldn't go to his Ma’s house and ask, unless he wanted to gain 12 pounds like last Easter.

_“...Then I walked across the street_  
And caught the Sunday smell of someone's frying chicken…  
And Lord, it took me back to something that I'd lost  
Somewhere, somehow along the way…”

In fact, as Bucky walked down the quiet streets, he realized he hadn't seen his Ma in months. It felt like years to his young eyes and rough hands.

_“...On a Sunday morning sidewalk  
I'm wishing, Lord, that I was stoned…”_

Bucky didn't just want to stop at Steve’s for breakfast that tasted like heaven-- he wanted to taste Steve. He wanted to savour him; maybe have him enough that the taste, the feel, the smell; the courageous, beautiful, down-right-wrong love Stevie chose to give him, would stay in his head until the Devil gripped his soul and dragged it to Hell, where it belonged.

_”...'Cause there's something in a Sunday_  
That makes a body feel alone  
And there's nothing short a' dying  
That's half as lonesome as the sound  
Of the sleeping city sidewalk  
And Sunday morning coming down…”

Bucky knew it was wrong to lust his best pal, but when Steve first kissed him when they were teenagers, Bucky was hooked. Before Steve went and found Peggy, Bucky had this stupid, hopeless idea that they’d live together in that broken flat forever; grow old and frail and be bachelors, not a doll or kid in sight, and that made Bucky happy, but so, so, so sad.

_“...In the park I saw a daddy_  
With a laughing little girl that he was swinging  
And I stopped beside a Sunday school  
And listened to the songs they were singing…”

He stopped at his doorstep and pulled his keys out, and pulled the fisted up bills from his pocket. He stiffly walked to Mrs. Ruben, and gave her the $150 that was needed. She gave him a hateful glance, and dismissed him.

He’d last another month here, then he’d probably move on; Steve said that the young couple bought a house and would be moved out from his building in a few weeks, and Bucky figured that if he wanted to be truly happy in life, he could get that apartment, and he’d get a good doll, and fuck Steve when her ‘nd Peg went out together.

_“...Then I headed down the street_  
And somewhere far away a lonely bell was ringing  
And it echoed through the canyons  
Like the disappearing dreams of yesterday…”

Unless they hated each other, or refused to be alone with each other.   
Bucky was so selfish, so cruel to himself. He wanted to live by his pal, someone he shouldn't even have sometimes. Someone who he shouldn't of ever had. But he did, and Steve had him a few times, too.

_“...On a Sunday morning sidewalk_  
I'm wishing, Lord, that I was stoned  
'Cause there's something in a Sunday  
That makes a body feel alone…”

He got into the shower, and washed his sex hair out, and then himself. Maybe too well, but he knew that Peggy was going to pop into the market for a few hours after their breakfast.

As he walked down the lonely city sidewalk, he watched the people pass him.

A girl, a small girl, a mere angel, she passed him too.

He wasn't going to pass this up, and when she smiled all teasingly and sweet and so full of hell, he knew that he would love her almost as much as he loved Stevie.

_“...And there's nothing short a' dying_  
That's half as lonesome as the sound  
Of the sleeping city sidewalk  
And Sunday morning coming down…”

~*~

“Angie, would you like to go dancin’ with me and a few friends this Friday?” Bucky asked, glancing up at her through his lashes.

“Well, sugar, I’d have to make time, but if you promise me a good time, I'm sure I can find a way.” She said over her pretty smile, and she topped up his cup of coffee, winking.

“I cross my heart and hope to die if you don't have the time of your life, doll.” He set a wide paw onto her delicate hand, and she grinned with hell in her eyes. She set the coffee pot onto a plate, and stroked his cheek with a her free hand.

“I’d better, or I'll have to report you to Cupid.” She teased, and set her free hand on her skinny hip.

“Oh, darlin’, Cupid can't catch this heart, but I know you are right now!” Bucky boasted and flirted. If he were to name his accomplishments and his strengths, chasing skirt was definitely up there, just after convincing Steve he was a good person.

“Oh, Bucky, you're so silly!” Her cheeks were shined with a nice pink, and Bucky could've kissed her cheeks until his lips were numb.

“I try, doll, I try… Hey, is there any lemon pie?” He laughed, and slid his hand off of her’s, and onto her arm.

“Yes, sir, but if you wait for a few I can eat with you.” Angie gently wiggled from him, and winked again.

“Oh, yes, ma’am!” Bucky exclaimed, and gave her a beaming smile. He really liked this doll. Almost as much as Steve.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Comment/Kudo/Bash it I don't care! Hope you enjoyed it and check out my Tumblr:
> 
> https://www.tumblr.com/blog/abbeyfangirl


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